Topic: Today's Joke

1/3 FEW CALORIES, TOO

A woman sent her husband and daughter to the health food store with a carefully prepared shopping list. They returned with a booty of Brussels sprouts, organically grown tomatoes, wild rice, tofu, veggie burgers, and a box of sugar cookies.

The man noticed his wife's glare when she pulled out the cookies. He said, "Hey, this box of cookies has one-third less sugar and fat than usual!"

"Really? Why is that?" she asked.

"We ate a third of the cookies on the way home," he replied.

Top Tips For Cheapskates

• Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.
• When reading a book, try tearing out the pages as you read them. This saves the expense of buying a bookmark, and the pages can later be used for shopping lists. (click for more).

Johnny Failed Exam

The big red "F" stared back at him on his exam paper.

Freddie looked at his glum friend and asked, "Why did you get such a low grade on that test?"

"Because of an absence," Johnny answered.

"You mean you were absent on the day of the test?" he questioned.

Little Johnny replied, "No, but the kid who sits next to me was."

NEW VIRUS

Just got this in from a reliable source. It seems there
is a virus called the "Senile Virus" that even the most
advanced programs of Norton and McAfee cannot take
care of it ..... so be warned. The virus appears to affect
those of us who were born before 1950! Click to read more....